{Five Minute Friday | Five}

It's Five Minute Friday. That means unplanned, unedited, straight-from-the-heart-to-the-paper writing. Yep, you just write whatever comes out based on a word you're given. If you have five minutes, you should give it a try!  Find out how here.

This week the prompt is {FIVE}.

Ready? GO.

We've only been at it for five days. Julia was having a tiny bit of trouble with her coloring page. The picture was too big to color, and her arm was already shaky and tired, so she said. That's code for I'd rather be watching Mickey Mouse Club House. So, she looked up at me, arms crossed, brow wrinkled and said in her most serious voice, "I quit school." I explained in my best matter-of-fact mom voice that quitting isn't a choice. She's four, so I didn't get far with my explanation before she determinedly said it again. "No! I do quit!" We took a quick five-minute break, played Simon Says says, and then took our seats back at the table. She finished her coloring page. "Mommy, I love school. I don't quit. My picture is beautiful. Do you see it?"

And, there it is. My little one didn't need to quit, but she needed a rest. You know, a time-out. Sometimes, I need a rest too. How often are we just moments away from a beautiful picture when we completely bail when a little rest would have done the trick? Or how often is the Lord clearly saying "take five," and we keep pressing and striving toward something that's not what He wants for us? Yeah, me too. It's because I often feel pressed to react quickly rather than allowing space for a proper response, from a well-rested soul.

Here's the thing: In those moments when I allow myself space to breathe and rest, God whispers just what my heart needs to keep going. Five minutes is sometimes all it takes to reset my heart and mind and realign my perspective. Five minutes with my attention fixed completely on Him can change what happens next. I love that.

May I encourage you, sweet friends? If you're frazzled, weary, or just a little bit bored with what's going on in front of you -- take five minutes. Breathe in His grace for the next moment. And, then get back in there. Finish the picture, with Him at your side, of course. It's bound to be beautiful.

STOP.

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{Five Minute Friday | Listen}

It's Five Minute Friday. That means unplanned, unedited, straight-from-the-heart-to-the-paper writing. Yep, you just write whatever comes out based on a word you're given. If you have five minutes, you should give it a try!  Find out how here.

This week the prompt is {LISTEN}.

Ready? GO.

This one should be easy, but it's not. I think our culture has a listening problem. I'm sure that's because there's a lot of noise, so many distractions. I get it. It can be hard to sort through all the competing voices and listen.

There are times, though, when I fail to listen because it requires something of me. It compels me to respond, to act, often to do something. That's when I let what I hear sink into the deepest parts of me. I want to be that kind of girl -- one who listens and is moved to respond. With my family, my friends, with God.

Jesus talked quite a bit of hearing but not listening or understanding. His brother James spoke about it also when he said, "Do not merely listen to the word, and so deceive yourselves. Do what it says."

Yeah. Listening and doing have to go together.

I've learned there is one voice I yearn for above all others. One that guides, corrects, teaches, encourages. It keeps my feet firmly planted on the ground and my heart anchored in truth. And, that's God's voice. God's word -- it's priceless. Yeah, that's the thing I want to let sink into the deepest part of me and shape me. His voice is the one I want to compel me to move and do and be. When God speaks to me, He sees my potential, the person He created me to be. He knows how to make me the best version of myself.  Of course, I want to listen. I want to lean in and take in every single word, and then do what He says. God, help me to do that.

May I encourage you today, sweet friends? If you're having trouble hearing His voice, pause. Be still. Listen on purpose. And, tell Him you're listening. I promise He has something to say.

STOP.

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{When You Can't Take the Next Step}

Let’s do something fun! Settle down in your most comfy chair, close your eyes. Now, think about one of your favorite songs. Do you have it? Go ahead, hum a few bars! Does it stir something in you? Why is it a favorite? There’s a good chance it’s attached to a significant memory or moment in your life. When you hear it, you remember. I have an extensive list of songs like that! I am a confessed music freak, so my list may be excessive, and I have been known to burst into song randomly. My friends still love me.

But seriously.

I remember the song I played a million and one times after my first bad breakup.  I remember the song the girls and I LOVED to hear when we went, ahem, line dancing. After the Lord had started healing my broken and grieved heart, I knelt near the babies’ graves and sang. I remember that song, too.

There have been moments when I couldn’t find words and a song said just what I needed to say. And so, worship through song has long been one of my favorite things. I love to gather with other believers and worship. God birthed something in me a long time ago about worship. It’s where I’m at home. It’s my sweet spot. Our invitation to engage in worship is such a precious gift, a priceless one. I am convinced God’s presence, His Spirit, changes us as we engage. And, boy, do I ever want to lead well in this area. As a worship leader, I have the opportunity to stand in front of lots of people and point them to Jesus. It’s such a big deal to me. Huge.

A few weeks back, an incredible opportunity came my way. I mean, seriously, amazing. I was invited to participate in a worship leader training/mentoring program. Y’all. My one-to-one mentor would be Christy Nockels. I’d also be learning from other established, experienced (and incredible) worship leaders like Kim Walker-Smith and Kari Jobe in live, video-conference small group sessions. There’s an opportunity to get constructive feedback from these leaders as they watch videos of me leading. There’s roundtable discussion with other participants and the leaders. It lasts 6-months, with the opportunity to extend to a full year’s worth of mentoring/training! When I got the news, I was beside myself. Excited, yes. But, also terrified. This kind of thing is WAY outside of my comfort zone. Like, I’m talking in another galaxy. I was going to decline because it costs a few thousand dollars. But, there’s a fundraising option, they said. So, I said yes.

But now, I’m stuck. No matter how I try, I just can’t bring myself to take the next step and raise funds. I’m struggling here because there’s no doubt it’s a good thing. But, is it a God-thing? I think so.

Then, why can’t I do the next thing? Why don’t I feel ok about asking people to “fund” or “support” me? I have a feeling it’s because I’m afraid. Because I don’t like rejection. (What if NO ONE wants to give?) I am afraid to be misunderstood. (What if SOMEONE thinks I’m selfish?)  It’s all rooted in insecurity and pride. And, never mind my lack of faith!? Wouldn’t it be true that if God’s asked me to do it, He'd provide a way for me to do it? And if I say God’s prompted me to do it, doesn’t that make it a matter of obedience?

But, still.

I’m feeling a bit of a hot mess today. Have you ever been there? You know what needs to happen next, yet you just can’t. That's where I am. I want to, but I just . . . can't. Every time I start, there’s a nagging thought that mocks me. We’re sometimes hard on ourselves, aren’t we? I’m working through this process, and I’m impatient and fussy. I’m ready to bail. But that doesn’t feel quite right either. So, instead, I’m left to trust. It’s my choice, of course. Whether I’ll ease up and realize I’m not really in control of what happens here is up to me. I’m not there yet in this situation. But, we’re working on it, Jesus and me. We’re always working on it.

May I encourage you, sweet friends? It’s okay not to be okay. It’s not wise to stay there, but remember we have a Father God who is more than willing to walk us through the days when we feel like a hot mess. We can rest easy in His loving, wise arms believing that He knows what He’s doing, even when we don’t.

He loves you so.

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{Five Minute Friday | Heal}

It's Five Minute Friday. That means unplanned, unedited, straight-from-the-heart-to-the-paper writing. Yep, you just write whatever comes out based on a word you're given. If you have five minutes, you should give it a try!  Find out how here.

This week the prompt is {HEAL}.

Ready? GO.

When my little guy died at eight months old, I expected healing would take a very long time. After losing the next child (she was four days old),  just fifteen months later, there were moments I didn't believe it possible to heal. Who am I kidding? I could barely get myself out of bed for a long while.

Healing is hard work, you know. It took some time for me to want to do it. It seemed easier to bandage my wounds and wear them as a badge. I believed I had earned the right to be angry and confused and wounded - indefinitely.  And so, I refused to cooperate with God and let Him heal me. It didn't take long for my identity to become wrapped up in and defined by my wounds. Anger and confusion turned to resentment and bitterness. But my scars shouldn't define me. Only God's truth can accurately do that.  

I'm so thankful for a God that pursues us. He heals and redeems.

Painful, difficult, dark moments and the wounds they leave behind can help shape us into something beautiful. But only when we come before God honestly, with our souls laid wide open, exposing all the wounded, broken spaces. Nothing is off limits. Nothing goes untouched. That's the hard part. Being honest and vulnerable, giving God unrestricted access to our broken hearts. But then, in the process, He reveals something to us about His character, about His unfailing love and faithfulness. And, you fall more deeply in love with Him and more convinced of His goodness. When God heals, He does so gently, yet with the strongest of hands, and He loves you lavishly in the process. Resting in His love eases the heavy work of healing. And, eventually, God becomes the only thing worth clinging to ever so tightly. And to do that, you're willing to let go of everything else that you've long held. It's a beautiful exchange.

May I encourage you today, sweet friends? He. Is. Good. And, He loves you so. When He asks you to let go of something, trust Him. He truly does know what He's doing.

STOP.

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{Five Minute Friday | Path}

It's Five Minute Friday. That means unplanned, unedited, straight-from-the-heart-to-the-paper writing. Yep, you just write whatever comes out based on a word you're given. If you have five minutes, you should give it a try!  Find out how here.

This week the prompt is {PATH}.

Ready? GO.

I always appreciate knowing there are purpose and direction when taking a path. You know, a beginning and end. I suppose that reveals something about the kind of person I am. There's nothing sweeter than a plan. But, as a follower of Jesus, sometimes the path seems incredibly hidden. At least, that's what I used to think. Now I understand my choice to surrender my life to Him marked the beginning. The promise and hope of seeing Him face-to-face mark the end. Everything in between is in His control. That's good news because He's loving, faithful, kind, powerful, and sovereign. My responsibility comes in learning to hear Him, trust Him, and obey Him. Even in that, He's promised to help me. Scripture says He gives us the desire to act according to His plan and purpose.

Here's the thing: He's always there. No matter the path, there is no place I go where He isn't present. So when the path laid before me only goes as far as the next step, it's ok. The beautiful truth is that He's already seen beyond that next step. And, His grace and mercy cover my missteps, especially when my heart says, "Lord, I want to do Your will. I want you to direct my steps along this path. I will follow Your lead." Because I do.

The psalmist said it well. You make known to me the path of life; you fill me with joy in your presence, eternal pleasures at your right hand. Yes, indeed.

May I encourage you today? He goes before you and comes behind you. And, He's with you this very moment. Ask Him to show you, and He will.

STOP.

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