{Five Minute Friday | Miss}

It's Five Minute Friday. That means unplanned, unedited, straight-from-the-heart-to-the-paper writing. Yep, you just write whatever comes out based on a word you're given. If you have five minutes, you should give it a try!  Find out how here.

This week the prompt is {MISS}. I am a day late to the party, but I made it. Woo!

Ready? GO.

Is there anyone else out there who loves a good plan? Yeah, me too. Sometimes, though, things happen that I couldn't have planned. Hiccups. Bumps in the road. Difficult seasons. Transitions. In those times, I find myself often looking up asking, "Is this part of the plan?" or "Lord, can we get past this point as quickly as possible?" There's something about the hard spots that make me want to rush through. It's like a head-down-running-as-fast-as-you-can kind of feeling.

Thankfully, the Lord is patient, and He taught me that I was asking the wrong questions in those moments. I learned that a better question was "Lord, What do you want me to see that I'm not seeing? What am I missing?" Yeah, that's the better question.

It's not that I stop praying for a change of scene or a swift resolution to the challenge at hand. I believe our conversations with God should be honest. But, Here's the thing: if we trust He's always working on our behalf, then we have to believe there's always something in every season that will be for our benefit. And because I know that He is good, and He's trustworthy, I don't want to miss the thing He has for me. I don't want to miss what He's doing or saying because I have my head down running toward the next thing as fast as I can. Besides, He always delivers on His promise to use everything for my good and His glory. You know what the best piece is? Lean in a bit so you don't miss this. You can always count on Him to reveal more of Himself, something more about His character, or about His love. And isn't knowing Him worth any momentary, light affliction? Yes, I'd say that it is. That's certainly not something I'm willing to miss. I don't ever want to miss Him.

Stop.

{Full Circle}

Sure, it's been a lot of years. He was born and died before he was a year old. And, Saturday would have been his birthday. Emotions run wild on a day like this. There's sadness mixed with happiness; and then, gratitude mixed with wonder at the unfailing love of a Savior who picked up the pieces and put them all back together. Yeah, there's that. It's not uncommon for me on these kinds of days to seek solitude and quiet. My introverted self demands it.  But this day was way too full.

Instead of solitude and quiet, I stood on a platform in a crowded room full of people I didn't know. I was there with a team of pretty awesome musicians - most of whom I also didn't know - leading worship. On his birthday. That might not seem like a big deal, but the significance wasn't lost on me, though very few people in the room knew my story. God, however, knows my story, and He whispered to my heart that day to remind me.  Sometimes, I need those reminders. You, too? In this very sweet moment, God was drawing a giant circle around that season of my life and reminding me that there was a purpose in it. This was it. He was using me to declare His goodness and unfailing love. See, the truth of who He is is and what He has done can be applied to any and every situation. Mine. Yours. His goodness breaks through darkness and brings with it a glimmer of hope, because He is hope. He. Is. Hope. Here's the thing: I would never understand the depths of His love the way that I do without having lived through those moments. He lifted me out of a pit so that I could do the very thing I was doing that day. I was telling His story! The story of a love so great that He gave everything. The story of a God so good that nothing compares to Him. Nothing. What better way to honor Tyler's memory than by standing and declaring the greatness of God? What better proof of the faithfulness and unfailing love of God than to stand and sing of His incomparable goodness? I just can't even. . .

May I encourage you today, sweet friends? God is good. His goodness will penetrate the darkness even in the most difficult moments. And eventually, those most difficult, dark moments in your life will become more about His goodness than about your pain. You will find yourself standing in a spot where you expect pain and instead, you find peace. Or, you expect sadness and instead, you find gratitude and joy. I promise. He loves you so.

{Dear Momma, It's Almost Your Birthday!}

Tomorrow is your birthday! I'm sure you have plans to celebrate -- at least, I hope you do. You deserve to celebrate. I'm looking forward to celebrating with you in a few weeks! That will be big fun! But, in the meantime, I thought it'd be a good day to remind you of a couple of things. You spent years pouring into me, and I wanted to pour something into you. So, here's what I want you to know.

1. I am grateful for you. Yeah, for sure. A funny thing happens once you're a momma. You quickly realize that being a mom is hard. Even on my best day, those pesky doubts creep in and leave me feeling like I came up short. And on my worst day - well, let's just say I'm left looking for a place to hide to avoid scarring my children for life. So not only do I want to say thank you, I want you to know that you did a good job. Whatever you did or didn't do, it worked out just fine. What I didn't quite understand back then was that being a mom was not your only gig. You were doing and being a lot of other things, too. So, thanks mom for sticking with it when you were exhausted and overwhelmed, on good days and bad, and on days when being a mom was the hardest hat you had to wear. Yeah, thank you.

2. I love you. But even more than that, God loves you. Maybe that feels a little cliche, but it's true. I am constantly reminding the kids of this truth, but sometimes, I need the reminder, too. I don't know the last time someone took the time to tell you: He loves you and you're pretty special, His masterpiece, in fact, created with intention and for purpose.

3. I pray for you. Being a momma is hard for sure, and so is being a woman. We push and strive trying to live up to unrealistic expectations and hard-to-keep-up-with standards. And we don't have to. We just don't. The mark of a great woman, I think, has nothing to do with all that and everything to do with how well we love the people God puts in front of us. And we can only do that well when we we fully realize how deeply loved we are. So, that's my prayer - that you know that you are deeply loved and can rest in that when rest is what you need. Nothing is wasted you know, even those seasons of difficulty; and, it is never to late to dream a new God-sized dream. This year, I'm praying that for you, too. 

You are lovely. I'm glad you're my mom. I am who I am because God wanted you to be my mom. I love that. I love you! Happy birthday, mom! Oh, and eat cake.