{Don't Hide. Obey.}

With every step toward the door of the restaurant, my heart pounded and the sick feeling in the pit of my stomach nearly overcame me. Just keep walking. And smile. They are watching you, after all. I wish they weren’t watching me! Just. Keep. Walking. If I hesitate, they will bail. Who am I kidding? Let's bail! That's a great idea!

Our family was there for a dinner meeting with my recently-divorced-a-second-time ex-husband and his new girlfriend. Did I mention that she had been my best friend? That’s right. My recently-divorced-a-second-time ex-husband was dating my used-to-be-best friend. The two of them had just welcomed a new baby, which, by the way, we only heard news of about a month before the arrival. We put the meeting off as long as we could. But now, we had to make introductions.

When I say that the kids were stressed and opposed to the introduction, I’m putting it mildly. The last time their Dad introduced a woman into their lives it ended badly. His last wife was, well, I can’t quite find a word that fits. She didn’t care for the kids, and they suffered emotionally at her hand. Even worse, the relationship between the kids and their dad was strained and damaged. He had barely started making an effort to reach out to them, and then, this. They just were not ready. What I really wanted to do was pitch a fit and tell him that I was disappointed and that he was on his own. There was no way I was going to help him out with this one! No way. Nope. Forget it.

But there was a not-so-gentle nudge to invite them for dinner. You know what that means, right? Now, because of that not-so-gentle nudge, inviting them to dinner was a matter of obedience. And that’s how we ended up in this mess! 

Am I alone here?  Have you ever felt like the right thing to do seemed the most unfair, impossible thing to do? Have you ever been standing in a moment with a decision to make and thought “There is absolutely no way I can do this!"? Yeah, that was me. Exactly. But, here's the thing: when you know the right thing to do and don't do it - it's sin.

Still, this was not exactly something I was looking forward to. But, wait.

God sent Jesus. And the last words that rolled off the tongue of the Savior as He died on the cross were “It is finished.” His work on the cross was done. He won. And so did we. It was the most lavish display of love the world has ever seen. In that moment, we were granted access to everything we would ever need to do those impossible, unfair, and uncomfortable things. Sometimes it seems the implication of that truth is lost on us. Do we really know what it means to have access to the same power that raised Jesus from the dead every moment, every day. Death-to-life power. In us. I mean, come on now. That's huge!  You know, He is constantly working in us to make us more like Himself. That means He doesn't leave us hanging on the edge of any situation left to figure it out on our own. Even the most impossible, unfair, and most uncomfortable situation.

We finally made it into the restaurant. We stood in the corner - still trying to decide if this impossible thing was possible. What seemed like an eternity passed before we walked toward the table. Both my daughter and son were trying to make themselves invisible behind me. But, we walked on, stumbling over each other. 

And there they were. My ex-husband. My used-to-be best friend. The new baby. And, three other children from his second marriage. Lord, help me do this. This is beyond the worse case scenario. She was my best friend. She was my best friend, and it didn't end well! I can’t do this! Do you think they noticed us? Maybe there’s still time to duck behind a table! Yeah, in that moment I'm sure we were all thinking the same thing. If only we could make ourselves invisible!

But, no. They saw us. There may have been a faint whisper of a cuss word in my mind before I managed to pull myself together.  Lord, please. Help. Me.  Before I knew what happened she had both her arms wrapped around me and tears forming in her eyes. And I was hugging her back! It was a real hug, too. It wasn't me trying to squeeze the life out of her. Dinner was as good as it could have been given the circumstance. Conversation was easy-ish. And, the kids were ok-ish. We didn't knock it out of the park, but we did the right thing. This time it just so happened that the right thing was really hard. It would have been so much easier to hide. But, I'm glad we didn't because God reminded me of something through the process.

See, God had already been in that moment. Long before I dragged my kids into the Chick-fil-a, He was there. I only had to choose to see Him. I only had to choose to access the power of the Holy Spirit that was available to me by saying yes to Him.  When you push through the fear and anxiety and obey anyway, God will enable you to do what He's asking. God reminded me that when we are standing on the edge of something impossibly difficult searching, doubting, trying to find a way to run, that not only is He with us, but  He’s  already been there ahead of us, fighting for us. And He won. It. Is. Finished. Our job is to fix our eyes on Him and to do the thing He’s asked us to do, even if it means doing it with teary eyes and trembling hands. Just obey. And, when you do the thing He's asking,  do it trusting that He's got it all under control. Of course He does.  See, God loves us so fervently that He sent Jesus to die for us so that we would never have to do these hard things alone. Be brave. He knows exactly where you are every moment. And, He’s there too. 

And, in case you're wondering, things still aren't perfect or easy in this particular situation in our lives. But, there is a peace that is beyond comprehension. For that, I am thankful. 

{Dear Christian, Are You All In?}

She looked so small standing in the kitchen with her backpack hanging off her shoulders. She had on a little plaid skirt and a navy blue polo and looked darling. I couldn't believe she was off to Kindergarten. I cried that day, I'm sure. But, I also felt extremely fortunate that she would be heading off to a private, Christian school. Six years later, she was much bigger and was heading out the door to the same campus for her first day of sixth grade. This was the year she learned a hard but important truth. Just because you label something Christian doesn't mean it's a fair, true representation of the label. The sad truth my young daughter was learning is that many people identify themselves as Christian and behave much differently than one might expect Christians to behave. The sad truth is that there are loads of people who are nominal Christians - ones who wear the label but look no different than the ones who don't. She was so confused. We parented her through it and now she gets it, but in the moment it was a big deal. What we figured out is this: there are non-Christians even in places that you might expect to be full of Christians (like a Christian school), and you cannot expect non-Christians to behave like Christians. 

But what about those of us who call ourselves believers? What about those of us who say we've chosen to worship God? What does that look like? Here's what I know: worship is about who we are and what we do. It's about our attitudes and actions. It's about recognizing who God is and responding accordingly. When we consider all of these, we gain a more complete perspective of worship and what it means in the life of a believer. Wandering aimlessly through our daily routines without consideration of what it means to belong to Christ doesn't work. Our lives must be lived with intention and purpose. People are watching. People are forming opinions about God and about His Church based on your behavior -- whether you like it or not. Here are three things we need to remember.

1. Worship is about what you love. It's a matter of heart. There is a battle constantly raging for our affection and devotion. We get into trouble when we try to live life from a divided heart. Scripture commands us to love the Lord with all our heart, soul, mind, and strength. That's it!  We have to love God wholeheartedly, and live our lives motivated by that love. Paul wrote that everything else was worthless - like garbage! - compared to the value of knowing Christ. When we learn to prize Christ - to value, cherish, and treasure Him above all else, our lives will reflect that.  One thing is for sure, though. You cannot worship Him in truth if You do not know Him.

2. Worship is about what you believe. It's a function of the mind. Authentic worship cannot happen apart from right knowledge of God. Can you imagine staring into the face of Jesus and being asked, "Who do you say that I am"?  So, go on. How would you answer that question? You know, the way we answer that question informs what we believe about everything else. It shapes the way we think about life.  And, the things we believe about life and about God, will determine how we live it. Can you see why it's so important that we be able to answer the question of who God is accurately? As we come to know Him we can love Him more deeply. When our knowledge of God is accurate and our love of God is deep, then our worship is accurate (true) and passionate.

3. Worship is about how you live. It's about what you do. And, I'm not talking about just what you do on Sunday mornings! What we do on Sunday mornings in our corporate gatherings should be an extension and overflow of personal, private worship. If Sunday morning is the only time you turn your attention and affection toward the Lord, then you're doing it wrong. What we do, what we say, and how we live must be in alignment with the standard set forth in Scripture. Our actions and our attitudes in our Monday through Saturday lives have to reflect the truth we declare in our gatherings on Sunday mornings. We exist to honor, glorify, and obey Christ. We are instructed in Scripture to be godly examples in speech, conduct, love, faith, and purity, to strive for personal holiness. It matters what you do. It matters how you handle yourself in every situation. That's what living worship is about. His name and His fame are on the line when you wear the label Christian. It's a big deal.

May I challenge you today? Take a few minutes, in a quiet space and imagine that you're staring in the face of Jesus who's asking you, "Who do you say I am?" Answer Him as honestly as you can.  And then, prayerfully identify things in your life that contradict what you believe about Him, and ask Him to help you change them. Be encouraged sweet friends. The Holy Spirit will do the work for you, if you invite Him.

Let this be your prayer: Teach me your ways, oh Lord, so I can live according to your truth. Grant me an undivided heart so that I can honor You, and let everything I do and everything I say be a true representation of who You are. (Ps. 86:11, Col. 3:17)

He loves you so. Don't settle for nominal Christianity. Just don't. The truth of who God is changes everything. Go all in.

{A Guest Blog | Purpose Over Preference}

I'm hosting a very special guest blogger today, and I'm SO excited. Y'all this guy is one of my favorites, and that's not just because he's my brother! You can follow Aaron on his blog, aaron-gibson.com or find him on Twitter, Facebook, and Instagram.  I couldn't be more thrilled to have him as my guest today.

Aaron Gibson | Musician. Teacher. Coach. Mentor. Husband. Coffee Drinker.

This is Aaron. He's a husband, puppy-daddy, musician, and pastor. As a teacher and speaker, he's relatable. He engages the topic at hand with an outside-the-box perspective and real life examples. His dynamic approach and teaching style are unmistakably authentic.

Aaron has been in full-time ministry since 2006 and currently serves on staff at Blythe Island Baptist Church as the Worship & Creative Arts Pastor.  He has a heart for ministry and wants nothing more than to see churches thrive and help people to experience the love of Jesus. He brings a wealth of knowledge to the table in the areas of church planting, team building, vision casting, and church production.  Aaron hopes to serve as a resource for others who are in need of direction and for those who are looking for fresh inspiration.

Aaron and his lovely wife, Tamara, live in South Georgia with their two puppies, Lyla and Sadie.

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{Purpose over Preference | Shifting Perspectives for Leading Worship} by Aaron Gibson

Have you ever stepped off the stage after leading what you thought was going to be an incredible set and felt like you were the only one who liked it? Or put a lot of energy and effort into selecting songs and working on flawless transitions to leave the service feeling like it didn’t matter anyway? What about anger? Have you ever started to get frustrated or angry with the congregation you’re trying to lead because they just don’t seem to be getting it? I believe we've all been there before. We've all wanted to lead an engaging life changing worship set only to be left feeling like we were the only ones worshipping.

That is a common problem facing worship leaders, but what do you do with that? How can you leave the stage knowing you've done everything you can to lead and not be a distraction? Is there anything that can be done to walk away with a clear conscious? I believe so. Through a challenge-laden season of my life, God taught me there are few things we can do, while on stage, to avoid having this tsunami of guilt destroy our confidence in our calling. But, most of what we need to do has to happen in the preparation.

I can remember coming home some nights, sitting on the floor with my head in my hands and weeping. Feeling defeated. Feeling like everything I was trying to do was a waste. I grew bitter. As a worship pastor, I became bitter and angry toward the people I was trying to lead. I remember saying things like, "There shouldn't be this much resistance", "Why don't they just get it", "Am I even doing the right thing".  The more bitter I became, the more I complained about the people.  

During this season, my wife and I took a trip to New York. I can't remember why exaclty, but I'm sure I was probably eating pizza and bagels for most of the trip. I can remember having really negative thoughts about my congregation back home.  While I was mid-thought, Moses came to my mind and the many conversations and difficulties he had with the Israelites and the many intercessions I read about.  Then I felt God speak so clearly to me it was almost audible. I simply heard, "Aaron, I called you to lead them to where they need to be, not complain about where they are."  That was my Job moment with God. Immediately my mind shifted directions. I knew God was taking our church somewhere special, and up until that moment, my heart had never broken for our people that deeply.  Up until that moment my heart hadn't been broken for my purpose as a worship pastor. To help people experience the greatness and victory of Jesus through worship. That is our purpose as worship leaders. Above all. Our pupose is to help people see and experience Him.

To accomplish that we have to Pursue Purpose over Preference. When we pursue fulfilling our purpose more so than we try to satisfy our preference, then when we'll see God use us the greatest. I believe we see from the beginning of time that man's preference has kept him from God's ultimate purpose for him. In my opinion, there are 3 key areas we need to discipline ourselves in the preparation process to lead people to the worship experience we all desire.

     1. Pursue Obedience over Opinion

This may require some extensive conversations with your worship pastor or senior pastor, but this is where it all begins. God has called each every church to be and to reach someone specific.  Who is it God has called your church to reach. We have to be obedient to that calling, not opinions of who we should be as a church. Sure, we may have a specific skill set or certain abilities.  Maybe you're really good at pulling off that country twang in a song or nailing some of those Hillsong guitar licks. We have to come to a place where we realize God's plan isn't dependent upon our qualifications. Paul is a great example of this. Everything about Paul would have led us to believe God was going to send him to the Jewish people to preach the Gospel. He knew the culture and the religion better than anyone. Paul had to change up his style a bit to reach the Gentiles. But he did it. He looked past his qualifications, past his opinion and he pursued obedience.

If we're going to lead people, we have to know who we are leading.

     2.  Pursue Relevance over Preference

After we know who God has called us to reach, we have to be intentional about reaching them. Paul says it like this in 1 Corinthians 9:19-23.

19Though I am free and belong to no one, I have made myself a slave to everyone, to win as many as possible. 20To the Jews I became like a Jew, to win the Jews. To those under the law, I became like one under the law (though I myself am not under the law), so as to win those under the law. 21To those not having the law I became like one not having the law (though I am not free from God’s law but am under Christ’s law), so as to win those not having the law. 22To the weak I became weak, to win the weak. I have become all things to all people so that by all possible means I might save some. 23I do all this for the sake of the gospel, that I may share in its blessings.

It's hard to do this one. It's hard to select songs based off of what people need versus what we like/want to play. I don't necessarily think there's an, "I don't care what you need" mentality. It's just not something on the forefront of our minds.  One thing that helped me with this is prayer. Not a prayer for wisdom, but prayer for the people. Prayer for them to experience the freedom and victory that worship offers. The more I prayed for the congregation, the more my heart broke for them. The more my heart broke for them the more natural it came for me to select songs that would lead them to where they needed to be.

Worship does an incredible thing in our life. Worship brings victory over life's difficulty. Worship positions us right in the middle of a collision where we are reaching for God and He is reaching for us. We get to lead people to that place. We can't make them worship, but we can remove distractions by selecting worship songs that are relatable to them and their life. Perhaps we should get past the words modern, traditional, or contemporary and simply try to relate to who God has called us to reach.

     3.  Pursue Engagement over Expectation    

I love soda. I love soda more than you do. Diet Dr. Pepper to be specific. I could drink it all day long. I would wake up in the morning to a bowl of Lucky Charms and Diet Dr. Pepper. Why? Because it's delicious. But about 1 1/2 to 2 years ago, I read that all the additives in a soda will certainly kill! But only after losing all of your fingers and toes. Well, maybe it wasn't that extreme, but I thought it'd be best to give it up. After about 6 months of being soda free, I thought I'd reward myself because I had been so good. Just a sip won't hurt. Besides...It's sooo good! Well, something happened in those 6 months.  My taste had changed. What I remembered to be so good, wasn't quite as good anymore. I went in with the expectation of complete satisfaction but left feeling disappointed. I believe we have the same type of expectation when it comes to the congregation we're leading.

We've all probably had or seen that worship experience that was just incredible. It sticks out in our minds and we strive for that type of experience again and again. Which is great, but often we are not having that same experience because we are expecting the congregation to come in ready to worship. We are ready, sure! But we have to remember, we've been there a couple of hours already. We've been playing the music and praying for the service. We were preparing with the intention for God to move in a big way. But what we forget is the husband and wife may have just had an argument in the car on the way to church.  They're feeling frustrated because they're running late and this time, they actually found both shoes, but only one kid. Maybe they had a rough week at work. Maybe they got fired. Maybe they got bad news from the test results. Whatever the case, we cannot expect them to come in ready to worship. We have to show them there is victory in life and over their difficulties in and during worship. We have to help them focus their hearts' affection and minds' attention on a God whose love for them is not based on their circumstances.  

Draw them in. Invite them in. Lead them to where they need to be.

I gauge the effectiveness of our worship gatherings a little differently now. Instead of asking, did they worship? How did they respond? I simply ask, was I obedient? Was I relevant? Did I try to engage the congregation into worship? God has me here for a purpose, did I pursue that purpose?

 I simply cannot make people worship. I can only lead them to a place of worship. If we pursue the purpose God has called us to, He is faithful. We will see the worship experience and life change we desire. I can honestly say that because it's His desire. Doesn't it just make sense to jump on board with where He's already going?